You don’t lack clarity. You lack trust in your ability to choose it.
Most people think they have a decision-making problem.
But what they actually have… is a self-trust problem.
Because somewhere along the way:
-
You were taught that being “good” meant being agreeable.
-
You were praised for being easy to please.
-
You were punished for knowing what you wanted—and saying it out loud.
So now, every decision feels like a trap.
You second-guess, over-explain, wait for signs, and outsource your knowing to other people.
But self-trust isn’t a personality trait. It’s a skill.
And you build it by honoring your voice—especially when no one else claps for it.
Mini Scenario:
You finally made a decision for yourself—no polling, no second opinions.
But within minutes, the spiral starts:
“Was that selfish?” “Should I have asked first?” “What if it upsets someone?”
You start reworking the whole thing in your head.
Not because it was wrong—
But because you’re not used to trusting that your decision alone is enough.
Reflection Prompts:
- Where did I learn to doubt my own instincts?
- What am I afraid will happen if I stop checking with others first?
- What decision do I keep revisiting because I don’t trust myself to stand by it?
- What’s one small promise I can make—and keep—to myself today?
- If I trusted myself deeply, how would I move differently this week?






